Wow, I just realized the last time I wrote anything about our adoption journey was in January of 2020 — almost THREE years ago! That makes sense, for the most part, since our little family has just been clicking along living life day-to-day. But leaving things with updates about where we are on our journey, or lack there of, isn’t the full picture of adoption. Adoption isn’t just how our family was formed, it’s part of our family every single day. So, this is my attempt at holding some space for adoption in our family and in this digital space. We often say that we don’t want Brighten to be able to remember finding out she was adopted because it’s just always an ongoing conversation. And it truly is, so let’s continue the conversation here, too.
Read moreSix Years, Two Kids, & One Dog Later
Photo by: Marchele Johnson, Marchele J Photo
December 1st, we marked six years since we submitted our application to Lifeline Children’s Services to become part of their Ethiopia international adoption program. We had prayed, researched, prayed some more, and as a still newlywed couple, we embarked on a journey that we could have never imagined.
Read moreTop 5 Questions I'm Asked About Adoption
In honor of National Adoption Month, I wanted to share the top 5 questions that I’m asked about our adoption journey(s).
Read moreMother's Day 2018
I’ve never been more thankful that a moment was captured. This was the moment the woman that I admire most in the world, my mom, locked eyes with my baby girl and just like that, everything she’d prepared me for in life mattered so much more.
Read morePaperwork Pregnant
I used to think it was kind of weird when people said they were “paper pregnant.” But here we are four years into this thing, one babe home after three adoptions started, one at the beginning stages (Haiti), and this is what it looks like.
Read moreA Place Prepared
It's been one year since we arrived home with our little Brighten. I vividly remember walking through the door, into our playroom, holding Brighten and introducing her to her home. Obviously, she didn't understand what I was saying or showing her, but I was so proud to bring her into the place that we'd prepared for her.
Read moreWhat was it like?
How in the world are we just a few days away from Brighten's first birthday? In some ways it seems like yesterday that we were packing our car and heading to Texas to meet our daughter. In other ways it feels like Brighten has always been a part of our lives. Jason and I keep joking that we are having a birthday party for Brighten to really celebrate ourselves and the fact that we kept another human alive for a full year :) I joke, but in all seriousness this has been the most sanctifying year of my life.
Read moreThai Food That Changed It All
I'm not good at keeping secrets. Well, let me rephrase that; I'm not good at keeping my own secrets. I've always been a verbal processor, so I think that telling my own secrets is some sort of coping mechanism. But with adoption, sometimes telling too much too soon can hurt the people who love you, and can break your own heart as well.
Read more5 Books I Read Preparing for Our Adoption Journey
Today marks one year since we found out that there was a little girl who would be born the next month in Texas who needed a home. What we didn't know is that we'd find out a week later that we were going to be her parents, and she'd be born exactly one month after we found out about her. If you'd like to read our story of Brighten, click here.
Read moreWhatever is True
It's been kind of a bizarre season of life for me. In May, I quit my job at a nonprofit that served kids in care to stay home with Brighten and to start my own consulting business. In June, we found out that we were not going to be able to continue to pursue international adoption in Ethiopia after almost four years in process. Now, I'm learning contentment, which, if I'm honest, is uncomfortable and completely unfamiliar.
Read moreThe Hardest Yes
I want to start by saying that I'm about to unapologetically brag on Jenny Clark. I'm going to tell you how amazing she is, and she'll probably roll her eyes when she reads this, but I don't care at all. She deserves some love and I'm giving it to her no matter how big that eye roll is.
Read moreUntil They Say We Can't
When Jason and I began our Ethiopia adoption process in December of 2013, we had no clue what the next several years would bring. We were, admittedly, blindly optimistic. We thought it'd only take a few months to do our home study (try 7.5), be on the waiting list by summer (it was the end of September), and be booking flights to Ethiopia by Christmas 2015. Thankfully, even basking in our optimism, we'd heard that adoption is not for the faint of heart, so we had the foresight to set some "guidelines" - rules for ourselves if the going got tough.
Read moreThe 'already but not yet' of Mother's Day
I remember the seat I was in. I remember who was sitting near us that day. I was so embarrassed. But I was so broken and I couldn't stop. The tears came in full force. Loud. Breathless. Shaking, I held onto the seat in front of me as I wept.
Read more5 Things I Want You To Know
Today is the last day of National Infertility Awareness Week. I've been working on putting this post together for the duration of this week, and honestly I'm nervous to hit the "publish" button. I'm nervous that it will be too direct, too opinionated, too much for some people. But my prayer is that if you choose to read this, you'll have a greater understanding of my story, and potentially stories that are similar to mine. My hope is that my words can bring us together, not divide, and that we can all rest in the unique plans that God has for us.
Read moreCounting Time
My great-grandfather, Storie, who Brighten is named after, marked timber for a living. All day, every day for years and years we walked the woods, marking timber. Everyday at lunch he'd eat a giant meal that my great-grandmother packed for him, drink a thermos of piping hot coffee, and laid on the toolbox of his truck to take a 20 minute nap in the sun. From everything I've heard about him, he loved his job, and he was good at it. Storie passed away just a few months before I was born, so I never got to meet him in person, however the stories I've heard certainly tell the tale of a man I would have loved to have met.
Read moreAffirmation I Needed
Technology truly is amazing. So much of it I tend to have a love/hate relationship with though. I find my phone in my hands when I really mean to be paying attention to something (or somebody) else. I scroll through the same posts and pictures throughout the day, beaconing someone to post or do something new. But technology also affords us so many wonderful things.
Read morePride & Identity: Striking a Balance
My, how life gets crazy quickly. In 6 months we have traveled to Texas, met our daughter, brought her home, went back to work, traveled to the West Coast twice, finalized her adoption, put our house on the market, taken our house off the market, and updated all of our international adoption paperwork. Whew, things have been busy. I began the year inspired to post something on my blog at least twice a week. I did that for all of one week and then fell off the bandwagon. Whoops! But here I am again, attempting to do better.
Read moreIt is Final!
What a special day February 7th is to our little family. We were in celebration mode all day long. We went to lunch, got dressed up, and got to go visit the big courthouse where the Judge told us that Brighten is forever ours and we have all rights just as if she'd been born to us.
Read moreDear Brighten, Always & Forever
Dear Brighten, on the night before we finalize your adoption:
I'll admit, I tried to write you a letter then night before you were born. But I just couldn't. There were so many nerves and unknown expectations, I just couldn't fathom putting into words all the ways I was feeling. But now, you've been alive for 137 days, and I've known you just as long. Now, I can begin to put into words how incredible you are, how blessed I am, and how the fact that I get to be your mommy forever brings me nothing but pure joy.
Read moreA Charles Dickens Kind of Year
Originally written on December 31, 2016. Held for contemplation and revisited on January 7, 2017.
These days my Goodreads list looks more like celebrity memoirs and less like a high school summer reading list, however, I'm thankful for having read some Charles Dickens in my day. Sometimes, authors give us words that make so much sense when we don't really know how to describe something in our own words. As much as I love Lauren Graham and her latest book is a such a delight, she just doesn't quite paint the picture of 2016. Charles Dickens on the other hand...
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